Happy Odd Family
by Quincette
Summary: What a poor little harmless baby that abandoned right in front of the door can do to our four hunters? answers: A LOT of mischievous miscellaneous... *CHAPTER FIVE* Hisoka and Illumi on the catwalk soon...
1. Baby BOOM !

Moshi-moshi minna !!!

This is my very first HxH fic

So I need your review, comments, feedback, corrections (betaed me, anyone?), or even flames would highly appreciated (but please be gentle?)

Ou before I forget: I disclaim.. HxH and all it's character don't belong to me*sobs* 

This story happened in Yorkshin City, where our four main character settled up (don't ask me how, they just did it) in the same house (they rent it together)

Leorio graduated as a doctor (pediatrician exactly) and owned his own clinic nearby

Kurapica was a hunter, and receive order through Internet or by direct order

Killua's looking forward for the next hunter exam

Gon's accompanying Killua (they 're planning to continue his journey to search Ging Freecs after Killua take the exam)

So here's the story goes (excuse the grammar)

= Thoughts

* * = Actions

***

Happy Odd Family

***

Gentle wind breezed through the wide opened window. Leorio sat in the couch, feeling a little bit drowsy. It's about 1 PM and almost all the clinic staff has gone for lunch, but he wasn't hungry, extremely tired yes, after two night in rows watching over a patient.

He almost fell asleep when the door slammed open. He covered his eyes from the light, a silhouette stood in the doorway, female, judging by it's curved frame.

As soon as his eyes got used to the light, the young doctor began to recognize her. A curly read-headed, indigo eyed, sharp cheekbones, and a pair of thin lips that curved into a huge smile. 

"Geez. Jerica ". He murmured.

"LEORIO DARLING!!!!! SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!!! I MISS YOU SO MUCH (^_____^)!!!" She cried and ran toward him, put her arms around his neck and hugged him almost choked him to be exact.

"Whatta -" his line was cut off as the girl shut his mouth with her lips

***

Meanwhile Kurapika drowned himself to _History of Famous Three Stars Licensed Hunters_, a book he hasn't been able to finish yet due the huge amount of orders he received last week. Such a hassle to fill them all, but he managed through it though, as he always did along his way to be a well-known, good-willed hunter in Yorkshin city.

And now, he's enjoying his spare time in his own way, reading a seven-and-half inch thick book.

He was just about to finish the 37th chapter when a loud noise came out of the door, distracting his concentration.

He marched in to open the door. The voice became louder and he realized it was a baby's crying. And it is what he found in front of his door. A rosy-cheeked baby in a baby blue outfit and a baby blue blanket, crying out loudly.

He stood there, stunned for a while, and looked around. There was no one there so he decided to take the baby inside. He rocked him gently, and tried to stop him from crying, but it didn't work.

He stuck his tongue out and tried to make some funny faces but unfortunately, the baby didn't think it was funny because it shrieked even louder. 

"Booo !". All right, he tried to play peek-a boo. But 'boo' didn't work.

"Rocked a baby in a top of the tree" (-) He sang the song rather panicky with the lyric he can hardly remember. But it didn't work either.

So he rushed in to the kitchen, searching for Killua's instant vanilla-flavored milk, still holding the baby in his hand.

The milk was ready, but what about the bottle? The blonde strode hastily to Leorio's closet, since he's a pediatrician, he must have some baby milk bottle somewhere, he hoped. And thanked God he had it. So now the baby's enjoying the milk, Kurapika hold him still with loads of question in his head.

Then he spotted a piece of paper, hidden in the blanket.

He took and read it

_Honorable Mr. Hunter_

_I was leaving my baby in front of your door for some reason that cannot be explained yet._

_This unnamed baby has lost his mother and had almost lost his own live_

_And I shall revenge for that, to finish the unfinished business _

_So, I, as his father hereby to ask you to take care of him for a while_

_Maybe you'll ask whyWhy you?_

_Because I trust you and I'm sure that my son will be save in your hand, _

_your reputation showed us all_

_And I asked you to trust me_

_That I will not abandon my child and I will return for him_

_And if you somehow feel burdened_

_Please consider this as an order from one of your troubled client_

_And for that of course you'll receive payments_

__

There was no signature on the letter, instead a lot of money attached, this baby surely came from a wealthy family. His parents obviously in trouble, but why didn't his father hire him to solve the problem in the first place instead left his child here and asked him to what? Playing babysitter?

Kurapika felt both annoyed and confused, and as tough the baby boom thing wasn't enough, Leorio barged in, yelling

"HOOOOONEEEYYY. I'M HOOOOOMEEEE!!!!"

What the heck?!.

The half-sleeping baby opened his eyes. 

"Oh no not again!"

Then again sound of crying baby flooding the air Kurapika rocked him nervously he couldn't stop wondering how's this small body with small lungs could create such an eardrum-ripping voice. He evacuated the baby into his room, away from Leorio's nasty calling, desperately trying to stop the cry again 

***

"What's that sounds?" 

"Euh dunno. " Leorio replied

"Is _she_ a good cook?"

"Yes very good " (-_-;;)

"Better than me?"

He nooded, scratched back of his head 

Boy I'm in big trouble BIG one 

"KURAPICA HONEYYYYY COME OUT WE'VE GOT A COMPANY!!!!" He called the blond again. Where is he? 

***

The baby was calmed down, half sleeping. Kurapika put him between the pillows and rushed out the room. What was that honey thing?!!

He found Leorio on the living room. He was just gonna punch him when he saw the girl.

"Kurapika meet Jerica " Introduced the pediatrician

"Uhh hi." Said the blond, brushing his hair a bit tried to look tidy

The redheaded stared him from hair to toe

Man, I must look like a mess Kurapika sighed

"So This is _She_."

SHE?!?!? WHATTA - (O_o)

"_This_ is your lover?!?" The girl raised her voice

LOVER?!?! BAKA!! WHO WHAT??? (O_O)

"Yes.. This is _she _." Answered the man, he gave the confused blond a slight wink

Kurapika glared him with 'WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?' look

"I'm sorry I'm not-"

"_She's _not in a good condition _she _had a chronicle fever last night " Leorio snapped his line, moving closer toward him and put his arm around his shoulder, while the placing other in his forehead. Kurapika tried to get rid of his hands, but his grip was amazingly strong. "See, you're hot. I think you should rest pumpkin"

PUMPKIN?!? OK.. THAT'S IT!!! THAT'S ENOUGH!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!! The blonde's struggling but Leorio put both his hands on his shoulders and pushed him inside the room.

"You can kill me after this but please just.. Do what I say stay inside!" He whispered then closed the room before the young Kuruta could say anything.

Okay he's very VERY annoyed right now

He turn to the sleeping.. . Oh no the baby wasn't sleeping anymore he's awake.. He chuckled a bitand that damned voice was in the air again but not just thatKurapika could see the darkened shade spread on the baby's baby blue pants 

OH GOD!!!! NO!!!!!

***

Allright !!!! That's the end of Chapter One? What was really going on with the three (plus the baby) ?!? Stay tuned for the next chapter(s) 

So How was it ? Review Onegai ???

__


	2. The Baby BOOM Continues

I'm Baaaaccckkk !!!!

Chappie 2 is here

Tons of thanx to the reviewers.(I'm working on the grammars)

Feel free to review, comments, suggest, flame (okay but don't burn me to crisp.. alright? )

Ok I hate this part: I disclaim, HxH and all of it's character don't belong to me (but I own the baby and Jerica woohoo)

***

" No-no-no no oh no This. Is. Not. Happening!" Kurapika watched in horrify as the darkened shade spread down to his favorite extra-soft-cherry-blossom-printed bedcover.

Diaper. Diaper.. I need a diaper I NEED A DIAPER!!!! GOD DAMNED!!! (-) 

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

*the baby's screaming*

***

"That's sounds like a baby's crying"The girl narrowed her indigo eyes in suspect.

"Uumh? There is no baby in this house" Leorio frowned What the hell is that noise? 

Kurapika's door slammed open, he's holding something covered in blanket, sounds like the noise came out of it. "LEORIO!!! GET A DIAPER!!! QUICK!!!"He yelled at him.

"Nani ? What for?! Wait What is That?IS that a bab-?!"

WHACK!!!! *Jerica slaps him*

"YOU. You you JERK!!!! YOU HAD A BAS***D CHILD???!!! With _HER_?!? LEORIO!!!! How.. HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?!?!?" Squealed the girl, pointing at him furiously. Tears were running down her eyes.

"AND YOU!!!" she's turning to the sweatdropped blond, " YOU STOLE MY LEORIO!!! YOU FLAT-CHESTED BI**H!!!" More tears were flooding out. She wiped her face in disgust, marched out of the house, slamming the door behind, leaving Leorio with huge red palm-shaped mark on his cheek.

Aww that's hurt 

That must be hurtthe blond thought

For a moment the two forgot about the noise, until

Kurapika blinked, he could feel something wet on his hands

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

*The baby's screaming again*

"DI-D-DIAPEERRR!!!!! LEORIOOOOO!!!!"

"WHAT?! WHO.. WHO'S BABY IS THAT???? Where, no, How, I mean-"

"JUST-GET-THE-F***ING-DIAPER!!!! HURRY-UP!!! (-)

"BUT I-DON'T-HAVE-ANY-DIAPERS-SUPPLIES!!!"

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

*The baby was keep on screaming*

"WELL GET ANYTHING TO STOP HIM PISSING ON ME!!!"

Allright oh BoyLeorio rushed to the dining room and back with some cloth in his hand. He folded it into triangle shape. "Allright put him on the table." Carefully he changed the baby's wet diaper with that cloth. "Okay there you go." He said, after pinned it. Slowly the baby stopped crying.

"Now, " he turned back to Kurapika , "Could you tell me who-" he stopped his question, sweatdropped, looking at the maximum raged scarlet-eyed Kurapika. oh now what ?

The boy pull his collar shirt, forced him to bent down face to face *bulging vein in his head*, "You-owe-me-some-explanation-for-insulting-my-masculinity!! And it better be a good one, or else!!" He hissed in a scary snaky voice.

"Well" The tall guy opened his mouth.

"Shuttup !!! I don't wanna hear some silly explanation now, I want to take a bath first!!" Snapped Kurapika furiously.

The Baby chuckled. The two watched in Horrify no, no, don't cry

He didn't cry. The two sighed.

*Leorio whispering* "You better not yelling It could scare the baby and he'll burst crying again!!"

The blonde glared him with 'ore wa omae o korosu' eyes, he pushed him aside roughly and made his way to the bathroom which was inside his room.

"Whose baby is that?" asked Leorio, couldn't help his curiosity 

"Read that letter in his blanket!" Answered him, almost yelling.

The pediatrician sighed, then he spotted the letter. He read it and sighed again so much things happened in a day

***

The hot shower never felt that good before, Kurapika lured extra soap on his skin, took his time enjoying every drops of the hot water. Few minutes later he ended it up. He wrapped a towel around his waist and opened the door.

And there, in his room, Leorio, slack jawed, staring at him.

"No.. I don't mean to I-I-I I went to my closet and the baby bottle was gone I-I thought you took it " He's trying to explain, but it was no use. 

The steamy fresh boy held up his chained fist. Leorio closed his eyes Oh God, make it quick

A 'bonk' was heard, then Leorio came out of the blonde's room, black-eyed. Moment's later Kurapika's out with some paper and a pencil on his hand. He handed those to him.

He read Kurapika's writing on it.

_I'm sure if I talk to you directly, I won't be able to help myself to yell or doing something that might wake that baby again, so we'd better talk trough a note. Now, go with your explanation, Who's that girl?_

Leorio sighed, writing an answer and gave it back

_She's my mother's counsin's doughter we're Grandcousins_

Kurapika raised an eyebrow Grandcousin ? Never heard such a thing

_Right Now, WHY WERE YOU REFERED ME AS A SHE?!?I'M A GUY, YOU PERVERT!!! YOU'VE SEEN IT YOURSELF!!! AND THAT LOVER THING AND THAT FUSS ABOUT I STOLE YOU FROM HER, AND SHE CALLED THE BABY A BAS***D?!! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON BETWEEN YOU TWO?!?! _He wrote

Leorio read it and took a deep breath, slowly wrote the answer.

_See we are _(scratched) _we've been _(scratched) *sighed* _Our mother had made a silly engagement when we're just babies, that if we've reach age twenty s _*paused* (scratched), _that if we've reached certain_ _ages and the two of us are single I'll marry her. _He handed it over

_THAT'S NONE OF MY BUSSINESS!!! THAT DOESN'T EXPLAINED WHY WERE YOU REFERED ME AS A FEMALE!!! _He wrote back

The taller man was gulping 

_Well I told her that I was taken she's furious and insisted to see my girlfriend. _

_Who is who? _Wrote the blonde

_Well I don't have one so I decided to take her home and hoped that you'll give me a favor topretend to be _*cough*_ my girlfrie_ (scratched)_ my lover?_ He read what he just wrote and hesitated.

Kurapika snapped the chat paper unpatiently and read it.

Leorio watched in scare as he saw some bulging veins appeared in the blonde's forehead and fists. He wrote an answer 'excitedly' that he broke the wooden pencil.

This is DEFINITELY NOT GOOD..!!! Leorio whispered, "Now now Kurapika don't be mad at me I'm just-" He stopped the line, stared by a pair of emerald eyes no scarlet ones. *gulp*

Kurapika stopped writing, stared. Then smacked the paper into Leorio's face and hissed,"I'm gonna kill you!"

"You'll wake the baby!" Wailed the pediatrician

"Don't worry, I'll make least sound!" He whispered diabolically

GOD! PLEASE MAKE IT QUICK!!! He closed his eyes

***

"TADAIIIIIIMAAAAAAAAAAAA!"Said Gon in a cheerful voice. He's just fishing in the river nearby and now he's home with a bucket full of fish. No one's answering. The house was strangely quiet. He went to the living room and found Kurapika with his scarlet eyes and black&blue Leorio next to him.

" ne What's wrong with you two?"

He approached the couch the two was sitting on, and saw a sleeping baby between the pillows.

"Haaaa. KAWAAAAIIII!!!!!" 

"Sssshhhhh. You'll wake him up " hissed Leorio

"Sorry." Whisper the spiky head, still staring at the sleeping baby

"Anou Leorio.. Whose baby is that? Your patient's? Why's he wearing a napkin for diaper?"

"WHAT?!?! A NAPKIN?!? WHICH NAPKIN?!?" Kurapika strode to see the baby, he didn't notice before that the cloth Leorio's using was a napkin.. Hopefully not his favorite napkin.

The he saw that, the napkin the baby's wearing was his crimson white polkadotted one. His favorite one, the one that he bought with through an irritating long bargain in the market.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"He's screaming, pulling his hair frantically.

The baby opened his eyes, and his mouth.

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

*The baby's crying*

"Gooonnn. Calm down the baby will yaEuhg !"Leorio choked as Kurapika strangled him with his tie and started to shake him mercilessly.

*shakeshakeshake* "I JUST WANT TO HAVE A NICE SPARE TIME AND READING A BOOK FOR GOD'S SAKE, THAT'S HARM NOBODY !!! RIGHT-RIGHT-RIGHT?!?!

*Leorio dizzy* "Rrrrright*chuckle* "

*shakeshakeshake*" BUT THEN A BABY SHOWED OFF IN FRONT OF THE DOOR, MAKIN HELLAVA NOISE !!AND HIS FATHER WANT ME TO PLAY BABYSITTER!! AND YOU!!!! YOU AND YOURFIANCEE!!! REFERED ME AS A SHE??!!! THAT BABY PISSED MY FAVORITE BEDCOVER AND MY CLOTH, AND NOW YOU'RE USING MY FAVORITE NAPKIN FOR HIS DIAPER!!!??? NOW YOU WANT ME TO PRETEND TO BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND!!!??? WHAT NEXT???!!! YOU WANT ME TO WEAR A DRESS AND PUT SOME MAKE UP ON???!!! I SHALL KILL YOU TWICE FOR THIS!!!!"

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

*The baby's crying* 

*Gon rocking him gently, sweatdropped*

Geez Poor Leorio..

***

"Tadaima !!!" Said a silver haired boy, entering the house with box of cakes he bought from the bakery. No one answered, instead there were loads of loud noises inside.

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"

What's that? Sound's like a baby?

BONK!!! Huh?

"Itai TASUKETE KURE!" Ah..Leorio's voice

"That's for calling me honey!!!" Oh Kurapika's mad

WHAM!!! Auch sounds hurt

"That's for calling me pumpkin!!!" Huh? Who called who what?

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh !!!!"yikes..!

"Kurapika, please stop!!! *Recognize the high-pitched sound* it's Gon's voice What's going on in here? 

CRASHH!!! I hope nothing break

"That's for staring me after the shower, you pervert!!!" wow, Leorio did that again ?

He got into the living room, amazed watching the chaos, Kurapika's beating the hell out of Leorio while Gon's holding something that's shrieking like a baby, trying to stop the berserk blonde boy.

Gon spotted him, looked like he was almost crying too. Oddly funny, "Killua, please stop them!" The spiky head wailed desperately at him.

Killua grinned and raised his hand, "Piece of cake."

"Nomatte, dameyo! Don't use--!" Gon yelled

BbbbbZZZZZZZZzzzzzzTTTTttttt !!!!

"--that..." ( . )

Too late. Killua stroked them with his electrified nen. But it stopped the fight indeed. Kurapika fell to the floor while Leorio gasped for air, both in semi-crispy mode.

"Killua." *Gon sweatdropped*

Killua grinned, in his neko-mode ( =^_____^=)

"You killed him!" Said Leorio

"Nahh.. He's just passed out. He'll be awake soon." Said the young Zoldick. He approached Gon and looked at the baby. "Whose baby is that?"

"Euh Dunno, Leorio ?"

"Long story, tell ya later." *dragging Kurapika to his room*

Killua shrugged his shoulder and went to the kitchen, placing his cakes on the refrigerator then he realized something was missing

"GGAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH WHERE'S MY VANILLA MILK???!!! SOMEONE STOLE IT!!!!! GOOOOOONNNN, MY VANILLA MILK IS GONEEEEEEEE!!!!"Screamed the silver haired.

"nnnnNNNNNYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhh!!!!" The half calmed down baby Gon's been trying to handle burst out crying again

Uh-oh This would be a long-long day*Gon sweatdropped*

***

So How was that? Chaos ne? Nah be lot more chaos on Chappie3 so stay tunned !!!!Well please review and if there's grammatical errors, feel free to correct me!!!! 

Note

Nani = what

Ore wa omae o korosu = I am going to kill you

Tadaima = I'm home

Tasukete kure = help me

Matte = wait

Dameyo =don't

__

__


	3. Four Guys and an Unnamed Baby

Chapter 3 is here

Pheww. I'm searching for HxH OST ANYONE PLEASE HEEEELLLPP MEEEESobbs

Anyway the plot will be a bit twist and turns but I'll come up with simple explanation

Ummm I'm a bit confused whether I spelled the Zoldick kids ( are they Irumi, Miruki, Kirua, Karuto, or Illumi, Milluki, Killua, Kalluto ??? even someone spelled Kalluto, Caillt ) Killua obviously spells like that (as you guys saw in the anime).. but the others gaaahh but I chose the letter l for all of them (actually I kinda like r better, but Killua's using l, so I guess I'll crash on l for the others too)

So fans of Hisoka, Illumi, Kalluto, Milluki (?), Hanzo, prepare yourself coz they gonna take part in this chaos too in ways that you guys can't imaginesome slight anime crossovers, but it won't be anyone you don't know.

It's December 24th, 11 pm ,Christmas eve, Santa's on the way, Merry Christmas to those who's celebrating (^____^) 

BTW Talissa chan, I saw you in hunter hq's guestbook

You KNOW I don't have HxH characters, so don't tell me to disclaim, you know it's hurt you're torturing me *sniff* 

***

Killua and Gon were lying in the bed inside their room upstairs, Gon was playing with the Baby. The baby was 'Daa-Daa-Daa'ing in amusement, seems like Gon could handle him better than anyone else in the house. Killua was yawning, lazily looked at his spikyhead pal who was 'Kawaii'ing the baby every ten seconds.

"NeGon give the baby a break to sleep will ya "

*The baby burping out loud*

"KYAAA KAWAAAAII!!" Gon gently tapped the baby' s back, sending more series of burps in various tones.

"KYAAA KAWAAAAII!!" (^.^)

*The Baby chuckle as Gon tickles his stomach*

"KYAAA KAWAII!! Killua have you ever seen such a cute baby? I love babies..!!!"

Killua sweatdropped ". Euh.. Wait till he's pissing on you.." ( -.- );

"Killua ?"

"Ne?"

"Ummm. Why did Leorio's fiancee thought that this baby was Leorio and Kurapika's? I mean I know that she doesn't know that Kurapika was a guy but even if he's a she Kurapika and Leorio couldn't possibly had a baby they're not married."

The silver hair frowned, "People don't have to be married to have a baby Gon .!"

".. Sonna . Eh, Killua. ?"

"Hmmnnn?" *yawning*

"I thought the herons would only deliver baby to married couples?"

Killua opened his eyes, "Herons?" ( -_o )

"Yea Mito-san told me that baby was delivered by herons all over the world, and since I love babies so much I asked her if we could order one, but she said that they will only deliver the baby to those who were married." 

The Henka boy sweatdropped uh-oh something's not right, "Gon How old were you when Mito-san told you that herons story?" ( o_o )

"Umm. Around six I guess but you said that people don't have to be married to have a baby. I guess they've changed the rule then.?"

". Yea I . Guess" Has he no idea where babies _actually_ came from? 

"Hey Killua!!! If what you had said is true then _we_ also could _have_ a baby for ourselves (^________^)!" He said eagerly with innocent-purely-clueless face of his.

Killua almost fell off the bed, he stared at the said boy with loads of disbelief in his eyes, "Gon. We. Can. Not." (0_0;;)

"Whhhhhhyyyyy noooot, look! *Held the baby in front of Killua's nose* Look at him! He's so cute but his father can come back and take him at anytime, so we better have one for ourselves!!! Please-please-please??? Pretty please ?? *puppy dog eyes* Puuuuuuuh-leeeeeeeease Killua ??? I'll pay for the order fee, and I'll take care of the baby myself, I won't bother you!!! All you have to do is browsing some information in the Internet of where we can find herons with some babies in stock!" He crawled toward the slack-jawed, widened-eyes, heavily sweatdropped boy.

The amazed-with-his-bestfriend's-stupidity assassin crawled backwards reluctantly, avoiding Gon's puppy dog eyes and his anxious rain of please.

"Please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please Killua?????"

"Ne-ne Gon Having a baby is not like Having a pet!!! it's rising a human being !!!"

"I know I'll take the full responsibility all right? I raised whale island's king of forest remember I can handle a baby!!!!" *widened his puppy dog eyes (yes, it is possible)*

Slunk! Killua fell of the bed. But it didn't stop the Kyouka boy from begging him. Eventually the young assassin's spine met the corner of the room, there was no more space to crawl back. He stared in horror, trying to find some good excuse to stop the spikyhead's maniacal request.

"Please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please" He didn't stop please'ing him. 

"Gon stop it. "The silver hair wailed

"Please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please." That Kyouka boy ignored him

"GON STOP IT" He yelled.

"Please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-please-pleas--???"

"GON!!!!"Killua grabbed his shoulder, eye met eye, "Do-you-know-where-were-exactly-babies-came-from??"

"Mito-san told me that they come from the heaven, delivered by the herons and put it in mother's tummy for a while coz the babies were having a jetlag during the journey from heaven to earth" He answered flatly but completely shocked the Henka boy

"AAAAAGGGHhhhh. Mito-san BAAAAAKKKaaaa" Killua's shrieking his frustration, arching his messy hair.

"Mito'san is not baka okay she's wrong at saying that the herons will only deliver babies for those who were married, but she is---"

"NO NO NO NOT that.. GON!!!! There were NO herons!!! It is the couples themselves who made the babies you see--"

"Really??? HOW??? We can make our own baby then!!! How? How? How?"

"NO. No, we can't it's.--"

"Huh? But we are couple aren't we?? Why can't we? Why? Why? Why?"

"Yea B-b-but you see the couple loved each other ack! see--"

"But I _DO_ LOVE YOU KILLUA!!! Don't you love me too?? Don't you? Don't you? Don't you? Do you, do you, do you feel like I feel???" (^______^)

Baka-baka-baka-baka-baka- stew-pid idiot baka !!!! (////) Killua felt like he was just gonna faint on the spot instantly.

"Do you, do you, do you feel like I feel???" He kept retorting (or singing?) the question.

"I I I I-I L-Love You Gon !!*blushing uncontrollably*!! But we just can't!!!" (///////) WHAT AM I SAYIN??

"Sure we can! I'll be the mother and you'll be the father as simple as that, you don't have to carry that baby in your tummy, I'll be the one who do that!" Gon was keep trying to convince him.

"Now-now-now, Gon. Listen. To. Me. When a couple loves each other they were.. Having they were.. Doing. Something that resulting the baby " (@_@ ;;;;)

"What thing? Can't we just do that too???" He drew himself less than inch to Killua's and he widened his grin (^____________^) and his honey brown eyes. He knew that Killua wouldn't be able to reject him that way. 

Other way, Killua just wanted to dig a hole and curled himself there. He would rather swallow a whole paprika along with it's seeds or stuck a fat wriggling worms to the fishing hook or anything but answering that sweet idiot's question. 

Suddenly the door swung open, "Dinner boys!" Leorio announced, gave a puzzled look as he noticed the two in the corner.

"Great!!! I'm starving!" Killua immediately stood up and made his way downstairs before Gon could do anything Pheww saved by the dinner

***

So there they were, having a dinner in the dining room. Kurapika was giving Leorio a total silent treatment, buried himself in his rice bowl. Gon was next to him, still staring Killua, who was sitting in front of him, with half questioning half begging eyes. Killua threw his gaze at Leorio, avoiding him. Leorio was pretending to be busied by his chopsticks, but once or twice he took a glance at Kurapika still completely ignored him.

The baby was not sleeping, but he remained calm, lying in the fluffy couch everybody could see from the dining table.

Gon watched Killua impatiently, tried to catch the silver hair's attention, but he kept on looked at another direction. Five minutes passed, . FifteenKurapika had already put his chopsticks down, finished.

Allright I have to break this creepy tense going on and Killua, You _have_ to answer me ! He thought, sending Killua a glare telepathy, tapped the table with both of his palms .

Killua accidentally met his eyes, and caught his message. No oh no Now he's gonna ask me that question in public Gon. Dameyo !

But the spikyhead's eyes answered back Oh, yes, I will 

Gon opened his mouth, "Killua --"

"H-HEY!" Killua snapped his sentence with unconsciously loud voice. But he immediately sweatdropped as the three pairs of eyes in the table was on him, waiting for what they thought he's going to say well, that's the problem, he meant to say nothing, he just wanted Gon to stop his question. He smirked awkwardly, scratching his head, searching something, no, anything to say.

Gon sighed and meant to continue his line, "Killua, where--"

"HEY GON!!Aww.. c'mon Killua say something to distract him thinkthinkthink You know T-Th-The Baby the baby-the baby BAKA!!! You're babbling Killua The Baby the baby what? Whatwhatwhat? (@-@;;) The baby Right! That's it! You know the baby umm we should give him a name, right? I mean we can't keep calling him the baby ?!"

Gon stared still, then he nodded in agreement, "Right! Kurapika, Leorio ?"

Killua sighed heavily, cheered in relief inside. 

"Surewe have to." The pediatrician nodded as well while Kurapika 'hmm'ing in agreement.

"Any ideas guys?" Three dropped dim.

"How about Buculus?" Leorio suggested

"What was that? Sounds like a plague's name!" Kurapika suddenly spoke.

"No It's not! It's a great name, it's a Latin for young bull!"

"It's hideous!" said The Blonde's frontally.

"Well have you any better idea then?" Leorio gave up

"How about Garaldar, old fashioned name it is, but sounds great, isn't it?"

"Yea then we can add barbarian for his middle name! What kind of name is that? Sound's totally barbarian!" Leorio rolled his eyes

"No it's not ! Garaldar is a great hero from the middle east at the age of Roman Empire!"

"So he _is _a barbarian! Forget it Kurapika, that name is too brutal for that innocent baby!"

Kurapika sighed, "At least it as better than that Brutullus thing of yours!"

"It's Buculus ! And you'd better find other name too."

"Kay what about Quellegebiet, sounds antique and meaningful ?"

"Huh Wassat again?"

" Quellegebiet it's in German, means source!"

"God Kurapika how do we Pronounced that? Not everybody has a flexible tongue like you do " 

"Allright What about Olleiyodeille ?" the blonde's came up again

" Right So I could yodeling his name? Read my lips Kurapika ; ri-di-cu-lous " Leorio mocked

"It's not ridiculous Olleiyodeille is a legendary three star licensed hunter who saved the Kinukinu tribe in Kunikuni island from extinction!"

"Gosh Kurapika you're too much reading!"

"What-ever I'm sticking with that name unless you have a better one!"

"Fine How about Feroverto ?"

"It suits you more, sounds like Pervert!" The Blonde replied sarcastically.

"Gee Kurapikaif you still mad at me, just beat me more don't blame the baby by giving him nasty names and rejecting a high qualited ones I've suggested!" 

"High qualited??? A name like a plague and other sounds like pervert??? You called that high quality??"

"Oh and you suggested barbarian name and that over tongue-twisted names.*yada-yada-yada, keeps on arguing*

The other two boys watched over their argue in sweatdropped of course none of those name they've mentioned suits the baby. 

"I'm feeling sorry for the baby when they finally come up with a decision, it wouldn't be a pretty name." Said Killua, shrugged his shoulder

Sweatdropped Gon sighed. He looked at the baby and sighed again, he stood up and brought him into the table.

The two stopped arguing.

"Don't bring him here, he'll make a mess!" Kurapika looked worried.

"You guys arguing without even thinking about the baby's feeling over those names. Now let the baby decided himself."

The three looked at Gon in puzzled

"Gon, he doesn't understand what we were talking about"

"Oh yes he does, just mention those name in front of him, he'll response!"

The three frowned He thought that he could understand the baby like he use to understand animals?

"Oh, well nothing to loose." Leorio ducked, face to face with the baby, "How'd you think Buculus?"

The baby chuckled then burped

Kurapika laughed victoriously, "See, he doesn't think it's good!"

"Shuttup ok Baby How about Feroverto ?"

The baby farted, every one were moving a meter's away.

Kurapika laughed louder, " Now's my turn, my turn!" He pushed Leorio aside.

"Allright honey How about Garaldar ?" First shot.

The baby stared him a while, the starts to drooling, sending Leorio laughed.

"Kay. Quellegebiet ?" Second shot

The baby chuckled, but then he slammed a glass beside him, Gon quickly caught it, spritz of water splashed the blonde's face. 

Leorio was barfing.

"Fine *gritted tooth* Olleiyodeille ?" Third shot, last one.

The baby laughed Kurapika smiled, but in split second he pinched Kurapika nose, and the whole table laughed in instant.

"Mwahahahahahah see He didn't like any of those name hahahahaha but at least he likes your nose !" Leorio mocked between his laughter

"Peh ! He didn't like yours either, and at least I didn't get fart from him!"

"But at least I'm*yada-yada-yada, starts fighting*

"Yare " Gon sweatdropped, holding the baby. As their fight became louder, the baby started to chuckle, and seems like he was gonna burst out cry again

"KURApika-LeorioRIO stop fighting!!! The baby'll cry again!!!"Killua yelled at the two

The two stopped shouting, looked at the baby in horror but the baby wasn't crying he's laughing he stretched his arms and started 'daa-daa-daa'ing

"Hey he's--" Kurapika said in amaze.

"Laughing "Leorio continued his line.

Gon and Killua stared at the baby, astonished. Gon smiled, lighting bulb popped out in his mind

"He like it!" he muttered.

"Huh ? Like what?" The silverhair didn't get it.

"That name!"

"Which name?" Kurapika and Leorio asked in unison

"Killua's"

"Uh I haven't suggested any names!?"

"No, you said that just now!"

"Whaaaat?"

"KURA-RIO!!! You said that just now.. and he liked it, see ?" he held the laughing baby

Killua smiled, "So Hello, Kurario !!" 

The baby grinned at that called.

"NO no that.. That's not a good name " Kurapika protested

"Uummm it's quite good, I think." Leorio commented

"No, no-no-no-no. It's not good, that's part of my name and part of his *pointing at Leorio*, those were definitely not match."

"It's cute." Gon disagreed

Killua nodded.

"No it'll bring him bad luck!!!"

"Who cares, besides, it's only a temporary name, his father surely has one for him, we'll call him Kurario until his father come back to take him." Leorio added

"No no.. No"

"Kay, lets vote, who agrees with Kurario ?" Killua announced, raising his hand

Gon and Leorio also raised their hands.

"Three against one, you lost Kurapika, fair and square!" The pediatrician said victoriously.

Kurapika stood there, feeling completely tricked, "You you plot all of this against me!!!" He marched angrily to his room and slammed the door, leaving the sweatdropped three.

Moments later he came out, walking toward Killua and grabbed the silverhair's arm and dragged him to the front door.

"Hanase Matte Where are you taking me ?!"

"Hush! I'm going to the supermarket to buy diapers and other stuffs, and you are going to help me!"

"Why me? Why not Gon or Leorio !" He wailed.

"Because if you're not helping me out, I swear I'll cook rainbow stew every day for dinner! Every. Single. Day." He said, in the menacing kind of voice.

Killua sighed, rainbow stew was Kurapika's nickname for the red, yellow, orange and green paprika stew (if there was the blue ones, he'll add that too, shortly every color of paprika), the recipe he got from Mito-san, yucky-yucky-yuckywell at least he didn't have to stay at home and wash the dishes and facing Gon's question, and maybe he could get some sweets laterYummm.. That thought was making him followed the blonde voluntary.

"Kurapika !"

"What?!"

"You owe me a bottle of Vanilla milk ."

*Kurapika grumbled*

***

Meanwhile inside the house, Leorio and Gon were washing up the dishes in dim. Kurario was playing the pillows in the couch

"Anou LeorioCan I ask something? I was going to ask Killua, but I didn't have a chance."

"Hmmm? Ask me anything Gon " Responded the pediatrician in maximum confidence, wearing his doctor-ish wise face.

"Anou how did human made their babies?" Simple question indeed.

That stroke the older man, a dish nearly slipped off his hand.

"Hmmm?" (^______^) The boy demanding an answer, staring at him with his soft honey colored eyes.

***

Well that was long ( at least longer that the previous chapter) So Like it? Hate it??? Lemme Know!!! REVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEW please-please-pleaseeeeeeeeeee??? And stay Tuned !!!!


	4. Family at a Cause

Happy Odd Family Chapter 4

Guten Tag Leute

Sorry abut the mistake couple days ago

Apparently it took longer for me to revise some parts

I'm sorry if the plot was too slow, I needed to write a few hints and things more before get on to the real problem our characters have around the story. Shortly I'm building a case here

Don't worry, I'll have added Zoldick family and Hisoka by the time you read the fifth chapter (for you guys who accidentaly read the wrong 4th chappie I uploaded a week back…uh, well it's my blunder, "Models' Bet" should be the 5th chapter, Gomennasai (-.-);;;;; )

Kay so here's chapter four, enjoy!

                Leorio sat on the closet, groaned. He's been sitting there for almost two hours, hiding. Hiding? From what? From Gon's question back at previous chapter (^.^;)! He did answered him with his careful choice of words, but every single one he'd given seemed only raised the spikyhead's interest to bombard him with further questions. So he used 'natures call' as an excuse to shove him up. In the first twenty minutes that Kyouka boy was standing immobile in front of the door, waiting for him to come out and answer his question. Luckily he got bored and went to the living room, playing with Kurario.

                And the next one and half hour the young pediatrician sharpened his earshot, Gon and Kurario's voices still could be heard from inside. He sighed heavily, as long as that over-curious boy still awake and Kurapika and Killua haven't came back from the market, he got zero chance in avoiding that question but stayed in that small cell called bathroom, and maybe he'll have to use bathtub for his bed that night.

                "How's he got into that sensitive matter?" He muttered in irritation as he plugged himself in to the empty tub. God, please let Kurapika and Killua come back soon.. The tub was hard and uncomfortable of course, however exhaustion of his worn out physic was overwhelming the inconvenient. Slowly his eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. 

***

                Meanwhile the two others were approaching the house with bags of baby's stuffs and goodies from the 24 hours store. The blond one unlocked the door and let himself and the silver-haired one inn.

                "Tadai—" Kurapika stopped his word as Killua husked him.

                "Ssshhh…!!!"

                "What?"

                "Don't be noisy or Gon would-- *ahem*, or you'll wake the baby up!"

                "Uh… all right… Why are you tiptoeing like that?" Asked the blond, staring at the silverhair.

                "Because I want to." Replied him, ignoring his puzzled stare.

                Carefully Killua poked his head on the living room, Gon was there with the baby, and both were sleeping. He let out an allay sigh.

"Poor Gon, he must be tired watching over the baby." Kurapika said, watching Gons innocent sleeping face.

"Kurario …" Killua corrected.

"I've told you I don't like that name." He countered shortly

The said baby opened his eyes and yawned, stretching his arms, snuggling, causing his baby blue capuchon slid open, revealing his bushy burgundy locks. Then the two awaken lads spotted something unusual hidden in those strands of hair. Pointy ears.

"Is that…?" Killua drew himself closer.

For a moment Kurapika fell into silent, "Souma tribe." he murmured.

"What?"

"This baby… he's a Souman…member of the Souma tribe."

"Souma tribe. I've heard that before, Ojiisan mentioned it several times, so aside these ears, what's so special about him?" Asked the silverhair, being not much impressed.

"His blood, the Souman have reddish-black blood, also known as Souma antidote, it's a cure that effective in almost all disease, even it's said that if a normal healthy person drink it, he'll live a decade longer. No wonder he's in great danger, numbers of blacklisted hunters must be after him."

"Blood eh?  That's not big deal; they could actually make money by selling their blood."

"True… the problem is their healing blood is circulating inside their bones, not veins, once a bone was broken, it took three times longer than an ordinary people to recover. Most of the cases ended up with death. This one is still a baby; his blood is in the most effective condition, pure black. The blood will go red and redder as the Soumans get older, and the healing vigor will fade." He explained, still had his eyes on the baby.

"I see, ummm… How much is it worth?"

"Last time I was bidding for Neon-sama in the auction for a tube of it, about three quarter billion zeny, that's the reddish black kind, I dunno how much the pure black one will cost." His answer made the other dropped his jaw.

"That much, a tube!?" he squeaked.

The blonde nodded, "They're rare items, hard to find, concerning that the Souman were about to extinct. The government did put some protection laws, but that didn't much aid them."

  "Wow…I never thought he's in that stern situation, I thought he's just an heir of a dirty wealthy family or something… Tsk, we have to tell this to Gon and Leorio."

Kurapika sighed, "You do that allright." 

The boy 'Hmm'ing, he turned to the sleeping spikyhead and lugged him to their room. "Good night." He said, climbing the stair, leaving the blonde with the baby.

Kurapika sat on couch, solemnly looked at Kurario's sleeping face. One his thumb was on his mouth. He just an innocent, harmless little baby, despite his eardrum-ripping weeps. The baby was too, member of an endangered clan, endangered just because some gift God had given them…just like his own clan… just like him. The blond softly caressed his pointy ear. "Everything will be just fine, I promise…" he whispered, pleading to protect the little one inside his heart..

He took the baby into his room, carefully placed him on his uncovered bed, stared at him for a moment, before he went to his cabinet. He took some book to his desk and read them.

***

Three short whistling came from the wooden cuckoo bird; it was three in the morning. Our young sleeping pediatrician snuggled on his 'bedtub'. He opened his muggy eyes, dozen of stiffness registered in his head. He let out a heavy groan, dragged himself out of the bathroom.

He stirred a cup of hot premium black coffee and sat in the dining room, sipping the liquid, stretching his all rusty muscles. He threw a glance at the clock… there was few hours left before  he have to go to work He was just going to wheel to his own room and jump down to his beloved bed when he saw Kurapika's door slightly opened, light came out of there.

He couldn't help to peek a little. The blond was sitting his chair, his head on the desk, sleeping, or fallen asleep to be exact. Books and scrap papers scattered all over, _Hunter's Manual, Journal of Extraordinary Tribes, Writer's Detect, the letter from Kurario's father, and some more books in various language. Leorio smiled. He went to his room and back with a blanket, carefully approached the sleeping one and wrapped him around. _

He spotted some scratch note Kurapika had written in red ink. _Pointy ears…Souma Tribe… Black Blood…Heart on the right torso… left-handed… _The young pediatrician frowned, didn't get what he just read. He scanned around, Kurario was sleeping peacefully… Leorio saw his ears. He loomed closer toward the baby. He was making sure that what he saw was pointy ear… it is. All Kurapika's scrap note began to make sense in his head. The blond must be gathering information about the Souman baby.

The young pediatrician undid his intension to sleep again; he just sat there, reading Kurapika's books.

Again, short whists came from the cuckoo bird, six times, six in morning. Leorio realized the time, immediately he rushed to his room, taking a towel and his working suit and rushed again to the place where he slept last night, this time to take a bath.

Fifteen minutes passed and he was done. Making his way out of the bathroom, drying his mane with the towel, he saw Kurapika through the half opened doors, still sleeping. Then a chuckled sound was being heard, Kurario was awake.

The young pediatrician rushed inn and tried to calm the baby down.

***

Kurapika moved hid head, eyes still shut. His ears caught some familiar cry, that baby… duh… this is gonna be a rough morning, he thought. He rubbed sleepiness off his eyes and focused his vision. He saw Leorio, holding Kurario, humming, calming down the baby. 

"Ohayou… Kurapika…" He smiled

"Uhhh… What are you doing here?" He replied, not exactly a nice answer for the man's greet.

"Just calm downed him, he was just awake, most babies would cry out, feeling insecure…"

The blonde blinked several times, loosening heaviness on his lids, a small yawn forced to come out, but he held it inside, he gave the pediatrician an unpleasant stare. He stood up from his chair. A blanket slid to the floor, not his blanket, he thought, staring at the checkered fabric. It must Leorio's. At normal situations he would've been beating the hell out of him if he woke up and found him in his room. He didn't like the man's presence at his private territory, but, yeah, maybe he was just being nice. He sighed, and then let his yawn out.

Leorio had his gaze on the baby, but his corners of the eyes' were on Kurapika. He felt uneasy after the incident the day before. Of course Kurapika hate his request to pretend to be a girl. Which man's not angry being referred as a female?

"Anou… Kurapika, about yesterday –"

"I'm not gonna pretending as a girl!" He snapped shortly.

"…. Oou-kay."

"What do you mean by that?"

"What? ... I said it's okay… it means okay."

"No,It's not an okay, you said Oou-kay."

"So? What is the difference? I said Oou-kay, that's my kind of okay!"

"I don't like your okay, sounds not okay."

"But I didn't say it was not okay…. Okay?"

Kurapika sighed and didn't say anything else to the man. He was annoyed, but he didn't want to start a catfight, he had no energy left.

The other sighed too, "Look, I'm sorry about yesterday… I have no idea Jerica would showed up from nowhere like that, I'm sorry for using you, I'm apologize for insulting your masculinity … allright?"

The blonde sighed again, "Why were you have to pretending anyway? That girl is quite pretty…Having her as your girlfriend is not gonna harm anybody."

"Because I don't love her."

"Then tell her that, it's better to hurt her now rather than make her feel betrayed like that."

"Tsk… You don't know her; she is the most stubborn girl in the world. If I said that I don't love her, he'll presume that I'm not _yet_ in love with her and she'll stick around with me, trying to make me fall for her."

"Wow… she loves you that much?" Asked Kurapika with a tone of both astonishment and disbelief.

"I don't know, but I know that is precisely what she gonna do. She loved our late parents very much, and their silly engagement was a very important obligation for her. I think she doesn't love me, she only thinks that she's in love with me, or she _have to be in love with me…."_

"Yeah… Still that is not so bad either—"

"Besides… I love someone already…" Leorio cut his comment

"Oh…"

 They were both fell into silent.

"…So… Kurario is a Souman, eh ?"The pediatrician started the conversation again. He tried to fasten up his tie, but it was difficult since he was holding Kurario

"You've noticed." Answered the blond

"No wonder someone's after him…" He commented, still trying to fasten his tie.

"Yeah…"Replied Kurapika… not very much listening, he was thinking something.

"We have to cover these ears then…"

"Leorio…."

"What…?"

"Okay…"

"What okay?" (o_0)

"Okay.." Kurapika repeated, paused a moment, an uneasy pink shade appeared on his cheeks, Okay… I'll pretend to be your… girl friend…."

"What!?" (0_0)

"You heard me, don't make me repeat that again!"

"But, Wh—"

"I'm doing this for the baby all right? The baby needs a family for a cover…"

"… uh-huh…"The pediatrician nodded, still unsure, "… family… for a cover… you mean, you'll pretend to be his mother?" He nearly choked. (0_0;)

"Yes… and you'll be his father…" Said the blonde, tried to say that in his usual tone.

 The pediatrician choked. "You know… you don't have to—" (0_0;;;)

"I have to; I did you a favor all right, now you do me one. This is advantaging you also, so don't make me change my mind." 

"Oou-kay…"Replied the pediatrician, still haphazardly trying to fasten the tie.

Kurapika sighed, "Here…" He approached, fastening the pediatrician's tie.

Leorio smiled, "You'll make a good wife Kurapika ."

"Shuttup !!"

***

Upstairs, Killua was still snoring in his slumber. Gon had already woke up. He ran to the window and cast the curtains aside. Morning light blazing in. The silverhair groaned and sank deeper into the blanket, not for long. His spikyhead pal yanked the blanket off him but he didn't want to wake up and stubbornly curled himself in the bed, hiding his head under the pillow.

The spikyhead 'tsk'ing and then he jumped into the bed, drawing himself closer to the silverhair.

"Ouuu… Ki~~~luu~a … Wa~~~ke u~p !" (^__^)

"RrrrrrGGgggHHhhhhhh….!"The half-sleeping boy groaned heavily

"It's six thir~~ty… C'mon u~~p ….!"(^___^)

"Nahhhhh…!"Came another groan

Gon scratched his head, waking up Killua is more difficult that waking up a hibernating fox bear. He's trying to pull the pillow off but Killua pull it back. There was a few moment of pillow tug of war game, eventually Gon given up. He shrugged Okay, if you won't wake up

"Yiihaa !"He jumped, smack Killua down.

"GAAAAHHHHH!!!!" The silverhair let out a large gasp. He found Gon sitting on top of his body with a huge smile on his face.

"Ohayo~~~ou!" (^____^)

"G-Gon…!"Said the Henka boy, rather shocked.

"Leorio told me!" Said the spikyhead enthusiastically.

"W-what?"

"The baby thingy!" (^________^) 

OH GAWD!!! THAT BABY ISSUE!!!! "… so?" Asked him as casual as possible.

"So… I know…" Gon drew his face closer

"… know….?" Killua could feel his own voice had shrunk into a shrill squeak. (o///0)

"…yup…." He's just getting closer and closer.

"…Gon…?" (0///////0) WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO???? WHAT IS THAT WACKO PEDIATRICIAN HAD TOLD HIM????

"Don't move."The spiky head pinned Killua's shoulders to the bed. He looked at the silverhair's face solemnly with his pair of honey pool.

"Gon…?"The silverhair wailed desperately. (@///////@)

The spikyhead caressed his cheek… his index finger was trailing his jawline… and stop near his lips. His nose is about to touch Killua's

"Gon…?"Killua felt Gon's finger tipping his lips' edge

"Gotcha!"He shouted

"WHAT ?" The silverhair burst

"Here." Gon pointed his lip's edge, "You go chocolate blot there. You ate chocolate last night and went to bed without brushed your teeth first, didn't you?" He accused. 

"I-I-I-I th-thought…Arrrgh…." BAAAAAAAka !!! What are you think he's gonna do, baka me, baka hentai, bakabakabaka !!! Killua was swearing at himself inside.

"tsk-tsk-tsk… later you'll get a toothache if you keep doing that Killua." Gon lectured him without noticing , "Mito-san always tell me that—yada-yada-yada…."

Killua sat there flustered to the ears. He felt something warn running from his nose.

Gon stopped lecturing him and gasped, "KILLUA !!! YOU'RE NOSE-BLEEDING!!!"

***

The wooden stairs was bumping with two pair of hurried feet; Gon was dragging the nose-bleed Killua downstairs.

"Leorioooooo !!!" Gon shouted.

"Here." An answer came from Kurapika's room.

The spikyhead barged into the room, panicking

"Leorio!! Killua is nose-blee –" He stopped his sentence, stunned by the view. Killua felt a dozen of pulses rushed into his nose.

 Leorio stood there holding Kurario, smiled, with Kurapika close to him, he was fastening his tie. To be honest… the looked like…husband and wi.. *ahem* … like a couple

"What?" he asked

"Oh… wow… you two would make a great couple." Said the boy innocently

The pediatrician choked as Kurapika pulled his tie. The blonde sent Gon a glare

"Cut it out." He snapped, "bursting in my room like that, what's going on ?"

"Killua is nose-bleeding." The spikyhead answered, turning to Killua. 

He saw the silverhair bleed heavily. Apparently, after what he thought what Gon's gonna do to him, seeing that intimate scene of the two was too much for him to handle. Poor Killua ^^;

"KILLUA !!!!" The spikyhead shouted.

***

"So… you two as couple…?" Killua grinned, two curled of tissue sheet stuck up in his nose to stop the bleeding. They were sitting in the dining room after breakfast and were discussing about Kurario.

"It's for the baby's sake!" Said Kurapika, added some pressure on his sentence.

"Lucky Leorio!" mocked the silverhair.

"So, we're gonna be his brothers then?" asked Gon, tried to prevent a catfight between Kurapika and Killua.

"We're too old to be his children!" Snapped the Henka boy.

"What about cousins?" Gon suggested.

"That'll be do." Agreed the blonde.

"Yay! We're a family!"The spikyhead squeaked happily. The three others sighed.

***

The same noon, at some airport, a young lady walked out an air balloon. A man approached him with wide smile and arms stretched open.

"Jeri-chan!"He greeted the woman. Hugged her in his arms

"Hi…!" The lady greeted him back weakly

"Daijoubu? Genki desu…? What's up with that wrinkle?" He asked her

"I'm having a really-really-bad-bad day… thanks for picking me up anyway…" She smiled. They walked out arm in arm.

"So where are you want to go from here?" he asked her while was starting the car's engine.

"Kukulu mountain please."

"Kukulu mountain? Are you really that pissed off so you want to hire an assassin to kill someone?"

The redheaded lady laughed, "That's a tempting idea…But that's not the main reason why I'm coming there, I had another business. Do you mind driving me there?"

"Oh no!" The man countered, "In fact I was glad coming there, I have an old friend there."

"Friend?" Jerica frowned, "Zoldicks don't make any friends."

"That's what they said. The truth is… ewan…" He smirked, licking his lips.

"You and that freakin` lip-licking of yours." She rolled her eyes, smiled.

***

Few moments later, Zoldicks's manor, Kukulu Mountain.

Illumi was sitting on a tree, feeling extremely bored. There were no orders for in past two weeks. He sighed, throwing another needle pin at an unlucky bee that was outside of its hutch. That bee hutch was probably empty by now, since Illumi used the bees as his practice target. 

Boredborebored. He gazed the manor, maybe Milluki had some interesting games… but he didn't want to meet his mother. Kikyou was a little bit too babbly for him that day; shouting at the servants to rub-till-shine the entire house, ordering Silva, Zeno and Mahha to put some gel on their messy hair and beards, and yelled the kids to wear their fanciest clothes, which was absolutely against his taste of fashions, last she ordered him to wash Mike! That's a hassle! That dog had never been bathing since he was born! His mother said it's to impress the upcoming client. Tsk! How lucky Killua was, to be out there somewhere. 

The said dog lying happily underneath that tree, clean and calm.

Wind breezed huskily… rushing through the green leaves.

Then he felt a familiar aura in the air, nen. Something was coming in high velocity; he held out his pin and threw it at the source of the nen. His pin stabbed something, nailed it in the tree trunk, a card, joker.

Before Illumi realized, another card flew by, less an inch from his face, few strands of his precious raven hair were cut off. 

All right that one hit a nerve.

He gazed around in anger, searching for the figure he thought was throwing the cards. 

He spotted three silhouettes on the path. His mother, a red headed woman, and… WHAT THE HELL IS THAT CLOWN DOING IN MY HOUSE??

The last person gaze at him and winked, giving him one of his freaky lip-licking.

***

Yooo minna!!! That's chapter four! Chapter five coming soon, more Zoldicks, it won't take so long as this one (Gomenn!!!) a bit OOC? Well I'm the author, I can do whatever I want MWAHAHAHHAHAHA *dodging from rotten vegetables*

Okay… comments, suggestion, flames (reasonable ones!!) are accepted. Unreasonable flame will be frozen out by Ilumi's smile MWAHAHAHHAHHA. I made a lot of grammatical errors, sorry, I'm in hurry, but I promise I'll make it up

Anybody knows where download hunterXhunter's OST???

Ok that's it for now, don't forget to drop a review !!!

  __


	5. Madness and Those Women

WOOOHHOOOOOO!!!!

Howdy Minna-san??

It's been quite a while huh? *gets rotten vegetables thrown at her*

Okay okay I know it's been too long *deep sigh* it's nearly let's see, last update on 19th January eto, four months? Waaaahhhhh, I'm the worst updater ever!!!!

Okay, gomenne *bows down apologetically* . It's just my head was so full of assorted ideas these days. Unfortunately none of them are in the genre of comedy nor humor (see my profile page, whole lot of drama there) and I was taking a brief (?) break from hxh and expanded my field to Inuyasha and Spirited Away and Fruits Basket... and Houshin Engi, and Malcolm in the Middleand *gets whacked* ehehehe sorry

But hxh is still my most beloved one. Though, if I read back the previous four chapter it was like OH MY GOD! So many typo and grammatical errors, gee! I was such a careless, immature, patient-less author. Maybe that's because this is my very first hxh fic, but that's not the excuse *sigh*. Hopefully this chapter will be much cleaner from such errors. Hopefully I'm maturer these times and have a fic with quality that will serve you some fun well enough.

I'll revise the previous chapters if I have the time.

Also, I made this one for fun, so don't protest any action put between ** which probably _some_ of you will think that that form belongs to the script mode, not narration one, but again I point this out, I made this one for fun, so I don't care as long as it fun-worthy. Flame me if you want, I'll roast some marshmallow with it.

And excuse a little (just a teeny tiny little) OOC-ness kay? I need it for some comic relief. 

Here's the fifth installment of Happy Odd Family 

Enjoy =(^o^)=

I own HunterxHunter not *sighsighsigh and sigh*

Twas already night at Yorkshin. A figure with his silverhair glinting in the faint light of the lava lamp tiptoed inside the room, trying not to accidentally wake his spiky head friend who was snoring lowly in his peaceful slumber.

Soundless and carefully, he reached the phone in the table on the corner of the room and dialed the only person he thought could help him. 

After several digits of numbers and a series of a tones, the line was connected.

"Moshi-moshi, Freecss' Tavern, may I help you?" greeted a female voice across the line with her familiar, genki-ever voice.

"Mito-san? It's me--" whispered the silverhair in the lowest tone he had.

"Are? KILLUA-KUN !!?" (0.0) okay, that was a loud pitch.

"SSSssshhhh hai-hai it's me." (.)

"AH! GENKI DESUKA KILLUA-KUN??" (^______^) my, how loud that was. 

Horrified, Killua flinched his gaze at the sleeping Gon, he could have sworn Mito-san's voice had reached the spikyhead's ears. But he slept still; the silverhair sighed in relief.

"Anou Mito-san--" (.);; he tried to cut her excitement.

But failed heavily

"HOW'S YORKSHIN? I MISS YOU AND GON SO MUCH! OH AND OBAASAN TOO! SHE WANTS TO SPEAK TO YOU HERE!!" (^_________^) an even louder reply.

"SSsshhh! Mito-san! Listen! I--" (@--@);;;

But the voice across the line had change, "Maa Killua kun, genki desuka?"

"I-I-I- I-I'm fine, fine, Obaasan." he stuttered, but replied the greet anyway although all that he wanted was to speak with the aunt; but who could ignore Obaasan with her beguiling granny manner? And at least her voice wasn't going to wake up the entire room.

"I'm glad you call, finally you can wake up early." she said.

(0.o) " eto, it's eleven PM already in Yorkshin Obaasan"

"Ara eleven PM?." she repeated in surprise.

Killua parted his lips to answer, but before he could, he heard a shriek from the other side of the line, and instantly the over-genki voice was back, "ELEVEN PM? BOYA! IT'S ALMOST MIDNIGHT! YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN SLEEPING BY NOW!" (.)#

*sigh* here we go again, "I know Mito-san, but this is urgent. It's about Gon, he's--"

"OH MY GOD! DON'T SAY THAT HE ALMOST KILLED HIMSELF AGAIN! WHICH PART OF HIM WAS BROKEN NOW?!"

"SSsssshh. (.);;; No-no-no he's fine, he's all right. It's only-- um, lately he's been having this--"

"OH NO! That allergy against the weather again?! I told him to eat enough vegetables everyday, is he did that?"

"No--"

"HE DIDN'T EAT THE VEGGIE?!!" (.)#

"No! I mean-- Yes, he did eat it's just, Listen--"

"AND YOU?"

"Me? What?" (@.@);;;;

"DID YOU EAT THE VEGGIE?!" (.)# #

"Well I-I-I--" (@.@);;;;;;;;;;;;;

"KILLUA! WHAT I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT BEING PICKY?!" (.)# # #

"Well I just--" Oh Damnit!

"I MADE THAT RAINBOW STEW RECIPE JUST FOR YOU! IT'S GOOD TO ADD SOME COLOR INTO YOUR SKIN!"

"I know listen, I just--"

"Oh, It's so you, little sweet-toothed kid! I even dare to bet that you haven't brushed your teeth yet! Have you?!"

"Well, I--" damnit! Why was he suddenly only capable to say 'well' and 'I'? And what was she? Capable of smelling the chocolate he ate an hour before from a telephone line?

"Oh Killua, have you no idea of what those germs could do to your teeth?"

"Well I--"

"They are lurking and destroying your teeth and your gums! You don't want to get a toothache and spend a weekend with the dentist do you?!"

"Well no?" What is she talking about?

"Promise me that you'll immediately brush your teeth right after this okay?"

"Well umm" *sigh* At least she turns down her voice. 

"And eat those paprikas all right?"

"All... right" *heavy sigh*

"Did I hear you sighed?"

"Umm no?" (.);;;

" what did you want to say earlier?" 

"Well, I--" Pheww finally

"Yes?"

"I--" (@.@);;; What did I want to say earlier? Suddenly he couldn't remember the said thing that felt so urge to ask, "I Oh Damnit!" a swear escaped out accidentally. 

"KILLUA! WHAT I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT SWEARING?!" (0.0)

Oh no! Not again, "Well, I--"

"OH I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN TO YOU KIDS! LIVING IN YORKSHIN IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU! THAT CITY IS FULL OF SWEARING VOCABS!" #(0.0)# 

"Oh Mito-san, I just--"

"I HOPE GON WON'T COME BACK HOME AS A VANDAL OR SOMETHING!" #(.)#

(@.@);;;; Gon? Yes, Gon! That's what I want to ask, "Listen-- Mito san--"

"HOW COULD I FACE HIS MOTHER'S GRAVE AND SAY THAT HER SON HAS BECOME SOME METROPOLITAN STREET PUNK--" # #(.)# #

"Mito-san--"

"--OH THIS IS ALL MY FAULT--" # # #(.)# # #

"_Mito-san_--"

"--Oh, I SHOULDN'T LET--" # # # #(.)# # # # 

"MITO-SAN!"

"DID YOU JUST YELL AT ME?" # # # # #(0.0)# # # # #

" I-I-I-I--" (@.@);;;;; Shimatta!

"KILLUA! WHAT I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT RESPECTING THE ELDERS?" # # # # #(0.0)# # # # #

OH NO!, "But-But-But"

"OH KILLUA! YOU--"

"GON WANTS TO KNOW WHERE ARE BABIES COME FROM!" being cornered in rows, finally the Henka boy shrieked the news out.

Silence.

"What did you say?"

"Gon. Wants. To *deep inhalation* Know. From. Where. Are. Babies. Come. From." he took a sharp exhalation after, and continued, "--and I don't know how to--"

"Listen Killua dear--" she cut him, with a surprisingly soft tone.

Killua dear?

"-- babies are delivered by herons from heaven for the married couples--" she explained with a suspicious tone (which actually a mother kind of voice, but since Killua didn't have the *ahem* _regular _mother, he found that rather suspicious), which probably forced to come out

Herons Oh, Mito-san, I'm twelve for God's sake!, and that was exactly what he said to her, "Mito-san! I'm twelve! I know of _how_ exactly a baby shows up! And Gon is older than me and he asked for the explanation. And I don't know what to say. I was hoping that you could do it for me."

Silence

"Mito-san?"

"Oh.. oh my H-how, Killua how could you know things like that?--" (0.0);;

"Well, I" NO! DON'T START THAT AGAIN! (.)'

But surprisingly the aunt didn't snap him again, ", how do you think would be the best way to tell him then?"

WHAT?! That's why I called you in first place!, "I, don't, know?" (o.0)

"Well I know time for this will come anyway Well I'll--"

Yes! She's gonna talk to Gon (^__^)

"--leave it to you"

WHAT!?, "Wha--hy?"

"Well you're his best friend. It would be much comfier for him if he hears it from you. It would be embarrassing to talk about it with me instead." (^.^)

"But-but-but--"

"I trust you Killua."

"But-but-but--"

"Ah it must be almost midnight there by now. You should be sleeping. Better chat next time okay?"

"But-but-but--" 

The lady ignored his 'but-but-but', "Don't forget to brush your teeth"

"But-but-but--"

"Goodnight" she said.

"Mito-san--"

*smooch* 

"Mito-san?"

'click' 

"Mito-san?"

'toot-toot-toot'

"Mito-san!"

'tooooooooooooooooooooooooooot'

"MITOOOOO SAAAAAAAAN!" in the end the silverhair forgot about the surroundings and shrieked his frustration out loud, "AAAAArrrrghhhhhhhh!!!! Bakabakabakabaakkkaaaaaa!"

A low groan from the bed froze him. He totally forgot that he was still in the same room with the sleeping spikyhead. But he was amazingly still sleeping, undisturbed, so much like a baby.

Like a baby? Okay, took back that comparison, because faintly, he could heard a cry; coming from downstairs.

"WaaaaaaAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAhhhHHHHHhhhhh!"

The real baby was crying.

Then he heard someone climbing the stairs. And a moment later the door was opened. And like a cliché scene seen in those monster movie, he saw a pair of glowing scarlet orbs glaring him from the darkness.

Kurapika. Raging Kurapika

The silverhair gulped, not knowing what to do, he smirked at him sheepishly.

The blonde growled something incoherent and seized the smirking boy by his ear, dragging him downstairs to face the crying thing.

The silverhair could say nothing but 'itai'

Later in the morning, ever-genki boy Gon woke up, and as usual cast aside the curtain to hail the cheerful sun. And as usual he turned around to the bed and said, "Killua Wo~~Ke U~p."

But there was no Killua there in the bed. There was no boy snuggling in pillows, avoiding the morning lights. Killua was not there.

"Ara?" the kyouka boy was surprised to learn that his sleepyhead pal had woke up earlier than him. He went downstairs, and found the three others in the living room.

"OOOOOHAYO-- Mmmphh." he was about to shout out a good morning when suddenly Leorio shut his mouth with his hand.

"Sssshhhhbe quiet, Kurario is sleeping." The tall guy whispered wearily.

The spikyhead was released after he nodded. Then he scanned the others' features. Kurapika was sinking in the fluffy couch, had his face sulked, his hair tousled and his pajama stained by something smelled like milk powder. Killua had a swollen ear, swollen eyebags (which probably the reason he barely could open his lids) and was continuously yawning. The spikyhead whirled to see Leorio. He seemed very much better that the two; those dark shades around his eyes were hideous of course, but that could be considered normal, for he often got them; result from night shift in watching his patients. And he would wear glasses to cover them anyway.

"I'll make some coffee, you guys want some?" he asked, particularly to those who paralyzed on the couch. Answered by their weak shook, the tall guy shrugged then went to the kitchen. Oh yeah, he was the survivor of the rough night.

On second thought, not really, for he actually bumped his nose flat into the wall on his way, and poured salt into his coffee. Well, at least the coffee made him fully wake up.

But it was the worst hangover Gon had ever witnessed. 

The only thing seemed normal was the kawaii baby sleeping with his thumb in his mouth, picturing the peace he got after all night torturing the three with his cry. Gon smiled at him; he could be the culprit, but he was still a baby, a cute one at that.

None of the three companions of him had a same thought after what they had been through. The baby was definitely harmful for them. 

***

Meanwhile, on the other side of the world, atop Sierra Padokia, was a bright noon above Kukuluu mountain and the residence of the Zaoldyecks.

But it was a flock of gray clouds on Illumi Zaoldyeck's head; mixture of displeasure and yet a tad of curiosity. What the heck was the jester doing in his house? Who was that red-headed woman? And his mother, escorting them to the manor instead of ordering someone or something to squash them like bugs?

The clown had realized his presence, and had given him a 'greet' even, with his card, which made him lost a few strands of his precious raven hair. Nothing could possibly annoy the young assassin more than that.

But he decided to keep his presence concealed, and as soundless as possible, followed them inside.

The three went to the living room, which probably for the first time ever had ones with no Zaoldyeck as a last name alive in it. 

And soon conversation flowed, strangely colored with laughter The young assassin, who had found a strategic spot on the shadowed part of the ceiling to spy on them, shook his head to make sure that his ears were working properly 

His mother, the killing bionic woman Kikyou Zaoldyeck let out some laugh as not a ritual after killing a being that's weird. And her tone of voice held some kind of what was that? Affability? 

Curiosity crept further into his mind. His mother had always been the frantic one inside the family if she heard the 'f' word. The word was strictly forbidden inside the family's circle of life, and mentioning it inside his mother's auditory range would result a few days in the dungeon.

Oh, not _that '_f' words. F for friends. Keep your language clean! 

Anyway, as he thought, his mother would go berserk if she heard that word. But now, he was witnessing her chatting nonchalantly with those who seemed close enough to be called with that famous 'f' words. 

What was going on in there? he ducked to get a better hearing, 

Then came a familiar voice, but in an absolutely strange tone, "Gosh, what did happen to you dear? You seemed upset."

What? _Dear_? She called someone _dear_? She never even actually used that pronoun to call her own children!

And then sobs, from the read-headed woman. She wasn't looked like was crying though, she was looked more like angry, very angry.

"Men! All the same!" she said, followed with more sobs.

"Oh, poor you darling You can tell me the story if you want"

_Darling?_ But that was his mother speaking for Great Zaoldyecks' sake!

The red-head inhaled sharply to summon her voice, and began to explain, "I dropped by at Yorkshin on the way here to see my fiancee. Him and I were betrothed by our late parents", she paused, exhaling deeply to regain her composure, " He was recently graduated from the medical school and had his own clinic by know *sigh* I've always waited for time like this, you know, Kikyou Nee-sama, when we both are having a firm carriers, we could take this engagement to another level"

Kikyou _Neesama?_ As far as Illumi knew, he had no aunt from Kikyou's side, nor Silva's.

"So I went to his clinic to give him a sweet small surprise, and guess what I've got, and even bigger surprise; he was taken. I was mad of course, but I kept it at bay, and asked him to introduce me to that whoever bitch that dare to take somebody's fiancee"

"Oh dear, that was awful."

Oh now his mother was comforting; his father would be very jealous, for she had always done the opposite to everyone in the house 

"He refused at first, I wasn't suspicious. I thought that he just didn't want to hurt my feelings. But I insisted, I was disappointed more than ever, I really wanted to see _her._" she paused again, drying her eyes with her handkerchief, and continued, "But then, I knew why he didn't want me to meet _her; _it was because be-because--BOOHOOOO---" she boomed crying.

Women

"I-I-I found out that they were not only living together, but they also have a child, a bastard child! Oh Kikyou Nee-sama, can you imagine how I feel?! I can't believe he could do this to me! He betrayed me! He betrayed our parents!" she shrieked between her sobs.

"Oh my! That's terrible!"

Oh no, terrible is your language dear mother added her son up there, only in his mind of course.

"And I can't believe he betrayed me for that flat-chested bitch *sobs*, for some completely-walking-fashion-disaster teenage blonde bimbo! *cry, cry and cry again*."

"Oh dearest! Poor thing! My first son is currently vacant of orders, do you want to have his service to get rid of that shameless slut?"

Oh great, a job for him, to assassinate the soap opera's vixen how ridiculous, that would be an insult for an assassin with Zaoldyeck's caliber. 

The read-headed woman was still crying, but shook her head anyway.

"Are you sure? You don't have to worry about the fee darling, it's our compliment for an old associate."

_Compliment_? She meant work for _free_? Hell no way! And _'an old associate_'? So that's the word his mother used to replace the 'f' words. Okay, he got to talk with his mother later, _a lot_.

The lady shook again. She dried her flooding tears and smiled weakly, "No thank you Kikyou Neesama, that was a wonderful offer of yours, I really appreciate it. It's only I know him, he's a bit too easy to be attracted by females; I assumed that he was only seduced. He's too kind that makes him act really foolish sometimes, and that vixen had seized the opportunity and used him to get _her_self a better life therefore, I'll try to win him back fairlyI have to open his eyes" 

"Oh dear, that's very nice of you" sympathized the other lady.

Meanwhile her son up there on the ceiling began to wonder if someone had killed his real mother and replaced her with her twin evil or something ('evil' from assassins' viewpoint of course). If all the rules inside the manor were written into a list, she probably would have broken all of them. First, she invited the outsiders in, and brought them to the private family area of the house. Second, she had a chit-chat with them with no business involved; unless the free service she had offered could be considered as one, but no, it was more like another family law-breaking. Business's business, no money no goodie. And so far she had had series of non-evil laughter, three 'dears', one 'dearest' and three 'darlings' in her sentences at a single conversation, in span less than five minutes, what next? The end of the world?

Then something with the sharpness of the razor sliced the air. A card. He dodged it, and found his sleeve torn in between. He threw a glare downwards, at the grinning jester. He was so puzzled by the two women that he briefly forgot his presence. And the fact that that insane jester was seemed to have noticed his spying on them since the first time was a nuisance for him. He didn't like being watched without himself noticed. 

'Hi' so Hisoka mouthed at him, earning another glare as the reply. He grinned wider at his annoyed face. Oh yes, he could see annoyance clearly plastered in the young assassin's face, even which it was no more than arched brows and gleam in his eyes. He could say that he knew him good

Curious eh? Illumi-kun? he teased him silently.

And since the young assassin didn't give him any reply else than a 'sod off!' glare, he threw him another card. And plastered a wider grin to see another cut in his burgundy shirt. Illumi was now wearing a sleeveless shirt.

Damn you! said Illumi through his famous glare, and threw his pin at the jester. 

And the jester, fully aware, held another card to counter the silvery thing aimed at his face. The pin was successfully stopped; it stabbed his card right in middle. The jester took a glance at it and blew a low whistle. He held the card so the assassin up there could see where his pin had breached.

Ace. Heart. His pin had stabbed the big plump red heart printed in the middle.

I wonder what this means winked the jester at him.

It meant several more pins thrown at him. He dodged one gleefully, caught one with his fingers (which made them bruised a bit) and purposely let one scratched his wrist, leaving a thin wound opened. He gave him another smile, and the wound a lick.

During that silly silent battle of cards and pins, were chatting the two women, totally unaware of the harmful things the other two were throwing at each other, except the mistress of the mansion felt like to shoot somebody for letting too many 'insects' 'buzzing' around inside her beloved house. (which were actually sounds of pins and cards slashing the air)

Nonetheless she continued the conversation without paying any heed on that ."Now-now dear, don't drown yourself into tears, tell me about something nicer, how was your life?"

The read-headed lady sipped her cup of tea and gave a small smile, "Fine, Kikyou-Neesama, actually our house is going to have a show next month in York Shin for the latest summer and autumn collections."

The lady assassin's voice raised in high interest, "Oh really?! Fabulous!"

The other lady grew her smile, "And even more! This will be not just an ordinary show, but an auction also, the viewers can directly choose and bid the collections that are displayed by the models in the catwalk!"

"Oh! My! How exciting! I will definitely be there!" responded her again.

Somehow her words turned the other lady back into her gloomy face.

"What's the matter dear? Did I say something wrong?" asked the lady assassin.

The read-head shook, "No it's just I was hoping that you would be one of my models, Kikyou Neesama, but, oh, I never thought that you would have such a terrible accident like this" she trailed the bandage wrapped on the other's face bitterly.

The lady assassin sighed sharply, touching her bandaged cheek in disappointment, quietly cursing her future heir that had cost her those awful scratches in his attempt to escape his daily training. "Why that's a shame, but thank you dear, I will gladly be your model if it wasn't because of this" she bit her lips.

Then it was the red-head's turn to cheer her up, "Don't worry Neesama, it'll heal soon enough. And here's my regards to my beloved, most loyal customer." she chimed, handing out an invitation which was richly embossed with gold color, "This is your free pass to my show, front seats, valid for your entire family!"

The lady assassin's voice raised an octave, "Oh dearest! You are the daughter I never had!" she exclaimed.

At this rate Illumi was nearly falling off from where he was standing on _The daughter you never had? _Oh mother, you have Karuto!. He immediately forgot about his little dart game, startled, staring his mother in disbelief.

Series of low cackles from the read-headed jester. That visit was fun; too much fun, but to add some more would not harm anybody well, maybe somebody, but not kill anyway. 

Taking advantages from the unaware assassin, he summoned a little nen inside of him. And with a little twitch from his index finger he threw the invisible bungee gum upwards. A perfect in and Illumi was now his yo-yo. 

"Oh, good to hear that again Kikyou Neesan! But as always,you're too young to be my mother! You have a daughter now indeed!" she laughed, "Anyway, where's your children? They often got to be our emails' topic, but I never met them. I've already introduced my best model here--" she paused, glanced the other red-head with a smile, "-- why don't you introduce your children?"

Hisoka smiled at the two, smiled wider to notice from his eyes' corner, that a frown rose on the assassin's face. Another surprise from me Illumi. glanced him at the frowning assassin.

Model?! What is she? Event organizer or something? Using a clown for her model? so Illumi's frown meant.

"Oh, how rude I am. I'll send someone to call them here!" said the lady assassin

Another job for poor Gotto. He would find Illumi's three siblings, but not him. Uh-oh, never, he didn't want to know the lady, he just wanted to pretend that everything he had witnessed was never happened, that his mother didn't have a split personality or something close to that.

You won't find me and I won't come down he said silently to his mother.

Now is the right time to introduce yourself Illumi dear said the jester down there with a wink.

And just then the young assassin sensed something fishy. Then after a little tug, and a little stumble, and a little nen used as gyo, he realized that the jester had got him with that sticky nen of his. 

Darn it! he cursed himself, clutching the wood to stop himself from falling. But it was no use, for Hisoka grinningly gave him another tug, making him hanging right above the two women. 

Just with one more tug, the assassin was successfully landing on the couch right besides his mother, with quite a thud.

"Oh! Dear! You'll give me heart attack! How rude of you to show up in front of our guest like that!" baffled his mother immediately.

Guest? I thought she was an _'old associate' _ he replied sarcastically, and inaudibly, of course. Only let out a heavy sigh as a private comment.

"Oh, Kikyou Neesama, this is your daughter? Oh she's beautiful!" commented the guest spontaneously.

Hisoka let out a gurgle, in almighty holding himself from burst out laughing.

The lady assassin's lips gaped a bit.

And the young assassin himself, who happened to be a normal, perfect male in gender widened his eyes, which in his poverty of expression, could be considered substituting a scream or a howl maybe.

But none of them negatived the red-headed lady, too stunned maybe and so she did continue

"Kikyou Neesama, I'd like her to be my model!" she said, enthusiastically.

And the assassin's jaw parted agape. Wonder what's that meant, a deafening scream, maybe?

But I would be interesting for sure. Especially for the jester 

***

My OC just can't tell who's a girl ad who's not, can she? *sheepish cackles* 

Okay, I have to end this chapter here. It's way too long than I have predicted (^.^').

Actually I still have conversations followed after

But let's make that the next chapter shall we? (that's a hint, the next chapter is mainly about Hisoka, Illumi, and Jerica's job, and a bet between the two, and also a scene on how's Kurapika being left alone with the baby to take care (^.^) I just love torturing characters 

Therefore I can't call this chapter 'Models' Bet' (like I've promised in the previous chapter, the said chapter is _hopefully _the next chapter) 

I hope this chapter didn't disappoint you guys there readers! (especially you, one that via email threaten to kill me if I didn't continue this one ! *sweatdrops*)

Kay, any kind of feedback (review: critics, comments, suggestions, corrections, questions, flames) will be gladly appreciated!! 

C'ya on next chapter(s) Pray that it won't take so long as this one

Lovekisshugsglomps

Quince 


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